Resolutions

I’ve never been big on New Years Resolutions, mostly because I feel that people go into it all enthusiastic making grandiose resolutions that never get fulfilled. But, as I’ve set ‘goals’ for myself in the coming year, I think I might be kidding myself with semantics.

Any good goal setting starts with reflection. 2011 was a very tough year for me on a personal level and a very slow year on a professional level. While I am always ready to beat myself up for not doing as much as I should, I’m going to try something new– give myself a break and forget about self-recrimination. There was a lot of moping about and wandering aimlessly for me for most of the year but I am happy to say that I ended the year on an upswing with a little momentum coming into 2012.

Discipline

Part of what I love about freelance is the free part. There is a lot of freedom and flexibility in being self-employed. But, lately, it has become glaringly apparent to me that I need some structure within my free lifestyle - even so far as putting myself on a schedule. As an example, I started this post on New Years day (2 weeks ago). I’ve been wanting to finish it ever since but something always came up.

It’s time for me to get organized and get structured. I am going to set some short-term goals and identify what I need to do to make them happen. Then I will divide my day and week into time slots to work on certain things.

Less Social Media and More Social

As a marketing professional who spent a lot of time doing social media and online branding for other companies, it was very easy for me to fall into the attitude that the key to establishing myself was a strong online brand. Add to that being in a new city where I knew no one, and it turned into me relating to the world through my laptop. What I’ve discovered is that the industry is full of internet-famous photographers who make more of their living being on the internet than they do shooting. Then there’s those photographers who are barely online at all but are constantly working on great and exciting photoshoots. That’s the guy I want to be.

It’s time for me to leave the comforts of home and get out to meet people. Some people call it networking but I don’t want to be as strategic as that in the beginning. I just want to build relationships with people that interest me and look for any opportunities to shoot. Which brings me to my next goal.

Ana and I testing the Leica S2 on a recent shoot at Pier 59 Studios West.

Shoot, Shoot, SHOOT

I don’t think there is any way I can stress this enough. I have 3125 images in my 2011 Lightroom catalog–pathetic. I expect to have over 20,000 images for 2012. It’s ambitious, even during the kontaktmag years I topped out at just under 9000, but that’s the minimum I will accept from myself this year.

Who cares about an online presence when you don’t have the body of work to support it. Right now, my quality work is 3 or 4 years old. I need to spend some serious time and effort building a new portfolio.

I have made friends with a local photographer, Ana Gibert, who is very active in the APA-LA and goes to portfolio reviews often. She has advised me not to throw out my past work and has offered to help me go through my library to see what can be salvaged. But, since I am heading in a new direction with my work, I still need to develop a body of work that will speak to the type of clients I want to attract.

Financial

I wrote about not getting into debt with equipment purchases and I’ve recently had an idea on that subject. I am carrying a pretty high balance on my credit card, which I would like to obliterate (the balance, not the card).  I plan on being debt-free within the next 6 months. I’ve been proud of the fact that my recent computer and camera purchases were cash purchases from jobs I was doing. But, as long as I am carrying a balance on my credit card, I am essentially still buying things on credit in spirit, if not in fact. Had I put the money towards my credit card, I would be debt-free.

I’ve made the decision to only buy new gear with money made directly from photoshoots. All my design and assisting earnings will go to my living expenses, paying off debt and saving. This will give me extra incentive to book shoots instead of sitting back and getting complacent assisting.

I am also going to finally get my bookkeeping squared away. I’m tired of having that hang over my head. I’m going to get on top of it and stay on top of it. Then I’m going to get enough work so I can pay someone else to do it for me. One thing I’ve learned as a entrepreneur is that we all have weak points. Bookkeeping is mine.

Personal

I have more goals that I am working to define including some personal goals such as getting consistent with my Tai Chi practice, getting in better cardio shape, continuing to learn Spanish, etc. I have a very good feeling about how things are going and the coming year. I know it’s only a calendar, but I am very happy to leave last year behind and concentrate on creating the life I want in 2012.

Finding My Niche

When I decided to leave New York and move to LA, I had a pretty concrete idea of what I wanted to do here and a vague idea of how I wanted to do it. In the four plus months it took me to get from NY to LA, everything has changed. My understanding of the way things work is part of that change but also my outlook on what I want to do.

With the next generation of digital movie cameras able to generate high-quality stills, the job of stills photographer on movie and TV sets will go away. Which is not a dream-killer because that was just a means to an end. I'd like to shoot promo images for movie posters and TV shows. So portraiture is more in line with what I want to do.

But, for a while, I have been very anti-marketing. I'm getting tired of being incessantly bombarded by advertising telling me I need this gadget or that outfit to be complete. As a photographer and graphic designer, I am part of this marketing machine driving people to consume beyond need and reason. But, right now, I don't see a way out of it without giving both up as a career path. I guess I'm not as sick of marketing as I sometimes think because I don't spend much thinking about giving it up.

The next two posts scheduled for next week deal with fashion photography and personal work. The fashion post is inspired by my recent discovery of the Annenberg Space for Photography and the Beauty CULTure exhibit they have going on. The personal work post was partially inspired by a talk at the Annenberg Space by photographer Mark Laita about his book Created Equal. It just drove home some ideas I've had lately.

I haven't really done any shooting since I've been here and I know I need to change that. If I don't find subjects I need to get out and shoot whatever I see. I have gotten out of the habit of carrying my camera everywhere I go. My iPhone is not a substitute for my camera. I know I won't just start getting jobs shooting movie posters so I have to figure out what I want to shoot as I work towards that and get on it. I think a personal project will get me on the track. I haven't figured out what I want to shoot, exactly, or how I want to shoot it. It's probably going to take some trial and error.

I do know that I want to express love in what I shoot. I have a couple of ideas of how to do this but I need to work it out. One thing I do know is I want my photos be be an interaction between my subjects and me. I thought of doing stealth street photography of couples but that's creepy and there is no interaction. I want to connect with the people I photograph.

Mark Laita said he barely talked to the people he shot before he shot them because he wanted them to be uncomfortable in front of the camera. He wanted to get the shots while they still didn't know what to do with themselves because afterr they got comfortable they started posing. Looking at his pictures, it clearly worked. But, I think that there is a third stage after the posing when many people drop their guard and then you can get a very real connection and a portrait that reflects it.

Obviously, I working a lot of stuff out. I will probably be working things out for a while so stay tuned as I express my ideas and work it all out.

California Adventure: Slow Start

My introduction to LA was not what I hoped and not really what I expected, either. Not that I had any great expectations, I just wasn't prepared for the isolated feelings I had. I landed in my new place Memorial Weekend. Doesn't sound too bad except I don't know anyone in LA and could only go as far as my feet would take me because, coming from NYC, I don't have a car. Fortunately, I am in the middle of LA and about a mile away from The Grove. The neighborhood I lived in reminds me a lot of a neighborhood I live in in Phoenix called Willow. The houses in this neighborhood were built before the concept of tracked homes was invented so each house is unique and has a character that modern "cookie -cutter" neighborhoods can't touch.

My new neighborhood reminds me of the Willow District in Phoenix.

It suits me and my tastes and it's a great neighborhood to take Shea on his morning walk. We have a little loop we walk but I think I need to change it up to keep it interesting for him. Or for me maybe. I have been listening to the audiobooks of a very long fantasy series I started reading long ago called The Wheel of Time. It has been great to keep my mind off of things I should not be thinking about. It's a very long (12 books) and rich story that is very easy for me to get lost in. It's an escape for sure but I'm ok with that right now.

Shea has found his place which, unsurprisingly, is the bathroom floor.

There is a place at The Grove called the Farmer's Market which is somewhat of a misnomer since there is only one produce stand there. It is basically a food court full of places you would actually want to eat at anytime. From Cajun to Brazillian, Korean to Maylasian, there is a great variety of good food. I spent my first week eating lunch and then catching a movie at The Grove movie theater.

I had a nice little break when a friend was in town and invited me to go to Magic Mountain with him and his girlfriend. I had not been there since 2006 so it was a lot of fun. I love riding roller-coasters, especially the smooth ones with loops and barrel rolls. They make me feel like I am flying.

Hangin' with Maria at the Self Realization Garden by the sea.

So last week I finally bit the bullet and rented a car because my friend Maria was in San Diego with her boyfriend and wanted me to come down to hang out. We met at Encinitas, just north of San Diego. It is a small coastal town that looked as though India threw up it's yoga culture and it all landed there in all it's colorful lotus flower glory. There were yoga studios everywhere and 'lotus' cafés and restaurants. We met at Swami's for some organic food and smoothies while right across the street, the Self Realization Center beckoned us to walk in it's beautiful and relaxing garden. It was full of people meditating, searching for themselves I'm guessing.

Ben showing me how to fly and even showed me how to start the thing up.

So from the meditating garden, Maria's boyfriend, Ben, took us to see the F-16's his fighter squadron flies. He is a fighter pilot in the Air Force and was in San Diego training other pilots. He took us out on the tarmac and showed us the jets and I even got to climb on one to check out the cockpit and controls. It's just like the movies and video games.

I'm working on finding my groove. All that work on a graphic resume went for naught. I've got a couple of consistent freelance gigs so I'm not desperate to find a job. If I can find a couple more of the former I won't even think about looking for the latter. I haven't done any photography since I've been here which I need to change. I've been wanting to do a self-portait but haven't figured out exactly how I want to shoot it. I'm thinking I should do several different options and see which ones work out the best.

So that's the update. Thanks for reading.

Surprisingly Ambivalent

I am on a plane to Costa Rica as I write this. Much to my dismay, I am completely ambivalent about this fact. I’ve been talking about going to Costa Rica for years and overcame resistance to make it happen this time. Yet, I cannot muster up the slightest bit of excitement. I am hoping it will change once I get there and it begins to sink in that I am actually there.

Leading up to this trip, there has been a lot going on in my life and I haven’t really had much time to think about it as much more than a looming deadline. Deadline for projects to be completed and living arrangements made were vying for my attention, not to mention my inner conflict of whether I really wanted to stay in LA or go back to New York. In addition, there have been personal changes that leave me without my favorite travel companion.

Between working on projects and intensive learning of Lightroom, Premiere Pro, Final Cut Pro, Spanish and anything else I can find online about photography business and photography in general, I have lived on my computer for the last 5 months even more than usual. I brought many learning things with me including the very textbook-like Best Business Practices for Photographers by John Harrington. But my brain is on overload so I think I’m going to forget all that for the next two weeks and just be. Just be in the moment and just be in Costa Rica.

Of course I will ‘just be’ with my camera. No detail will escape my lens. If I haven’t taken over 1000 pictures by the end of my trip, I haven’t gotten out enough. I am also there visiting my old song-writing partner so I expect some new music to come out of this. So I guess I have more plans than I thought. I will be posting regularly on this blog and my 90 Days photo blog for those who want to experience this vicariously through me. It is in the moment that I will find my passion for this trip through images, words and music.

Changing Tide

Times change. Situations change. Plans change. That is my reality. As I sit down to write this, the news came through that Osama bin Laden has been killed. As people take to the streets in Times Square and the WTC, I wonder if I would have joined them had I still been living in my apartment adjacent to Ground Zero. Actually, I've been thinking about my former life in New York a lot lately. So much that I've been having second thoughts about staying in LA. I miss New York, it got under my skin.

I still have this feeling that I need to give LA a chance. So I've found a place to sublet until late July. I figure that should give me a better feel of what I want to do. The other benefit to subletting is being able to meet friends of my new roommates. In July I can decide if I want to stay in LA or head back to NYC.

A significant contributing factor could be a job I am applying for. Pulitzer Prize winning photographer Vincent Laforet posted three job openings on his blog. They are not studio jobs but rather blogging jobs but it is definitely somewhere I want to be. I watched his creativeLIVE workshop on transitioning from still photography to video and he seems like a pretty cool guy.

I'm sure he has hundreds, if not thousands, of applicants for these positions so I wanted to come up with something that would get me noticed enough to warrant an interview. So I spend all day today creating a graphic resume.

Click on this to see a larger version of my resume based on the Premiere Pro workspace layout.

I had an idea to use the Adobe CS5 video editing Premiere Pro workspace as the basis for my resume. Laforet was using the program in his workshop so I thought it might stand out for him. It took way longer than I thought to complete, but I'm thinking it will get me past the first round and maybe an interview.

So once I get back from Costa Rica, I'll live in LA for two months and then decided what to do from there. Vincent Laforet could definitely persuade me to stay. Wish me luck.

There’s No Place Like…

I was in LA yesterday with some time to kill so I decided to look at some apartments on Fuller St. near Runyon Canyon. The area is dog friendly and there is a constant flow of people walking, running and otherwise exercising. There was even a mass yoga class going on in a grassy area.

The apartment I looked at was pretty cool. It had a similar layout to my apartment in NYC only slightly smaller, surprisingly. It was also less expensive by almost a third.

I didn't love it. It is not a reflection on the apartment, I haven't really liked anything I've found in LA. This concerns me a little but I know I need to give it a chance. I definitely can't go around comparing it to New York. That will just depress me and piss off people I meet.

It is difficult for me to be so transient. I love to travel and go places but I also want to have a place to come home to.
Not only am I transient, I'm in a strange city with no friends or support system here. Sometimes it is very daunting.
But, I have to give it a chance. I'll give it a year of networking and developing a social circle and see what happens.

Keep Shooting

After spending two weeks in Phoenix, I find myself back in Bakersfield and, quite frankly, in a little bit of a funk. I was pretty busy working in Phoenix with three unexpected shoots and the video shoot I originally went to Phoenix to do. When I wasn't working, I was catching up with friends. It was a pretty nice two weeks. Special shout out to Tyler and Katie for putting me up.

Now, back in Bakersfield, I am doing some freelance design work and getting ready to edit the video footage shot in Phoenix. This place is sucking the life out of me. I am so uninspired and so unmotivated here. This post was supposed to happen two days ago. Bakersfield was just a stop off for a month or two but some jobs got delayed and some travel opportunities came up so I postponed my move to LA for a couple more months.

A ballroom gown shoot for designer Kristin Dinnis in NYC.

One thing I know for certain is I need to find a way to keep shooting. My creativity and my attitude are always up when I'm shooting regularly. Even though I'm here for a purpose and working on freelance projects, I feel like I'm in limbo. The problem is, here in Bakersfield, I am so uninspired I can't find anything worth photographing. Maybe I should take this as a challenge to try and find things to photograph.

The good news is relief is on the way. I'm getting ready to look for an place to live in LA. I found some lofts in Downtown LA and some apartments online. I will be checking them out later this week. In a week I'll be going back to Phoenix to shoot a friend's wedding and shortly after that, heading to Costa Rica. If that doesn't give me a kick, I don't know what will.